Cheering up someone should be pretty simple, but is it? Cheering up someone who is sad because they have gone through some kind of a heartbreak or grief, is the most difficult thing to do. It could be a friend who is nursing a heartbreak or getting over the loss of a loved one or a pet, is upset over failure in an exam, job, or business, or is simply having mood swings. As a good friend, you might want to butt in and try to make them feel better.
Thumbs up for trying to be the good Samaritan, but you must also know two things before you attempt to cheer someone up. One, not all people want someone to nag around them asking them what’s wrong and can they help. Unless you are sure that the other person needs you around, it can get very irritating for the other person to have someone barge in their lives despite the good intentions. And two, be prepared to get screamed at, being told that you aren’t sensitive enough or understanding enough, but also know that the other person might not really mean it. In spite of this, if you care enough to want to cheer a person, here are five things to keep in mind.
Listen, don’t talk.
A person who is sad needs a patient ear. Let them vent and speak about their feelings. As tempting as it might be, don’t talk about a similar situation you have been in and how valiantly you handled it. Resist the urge to dole out advice.
Offer a service.
More than advice, a sad person needs help. As per the need, you can offer to bring food, pick up and drop their kids, run some errand, loan your vehicle or maybe even offer financial help if you can afford it. Helping without waiting to be asked is much better than telling them to call you if they need help. That almost never happens.
Take them out.
When someone is sad, they tend to get holed up at their home for prolonged periods. Get them out in the sun, take them for a movie or for a drink, get some friends together or plan a small outing. Think of all the fun things they’d love to do. But don’t go overboard and don’t plan things which they might not enjoy!
Leave them alone.
Avoid the urge to keep hanging around them at all times; everyone needs some moments of solitude. Give them time alone to reflect on their loss. Let them know that you’ll be around.
Show some love.
Hugs are a great way to show love. Studies say that hugs release a feel-good hormone and trigger receptors in the brain that makes one feel comforted. If hugs don’t figure in the scheme of things - hold hands, they have the same effect. You could even buy them a gift to show that you care. It need not be expensive or extravagant, just thoughtful enough.
What would you like to add to the above list?