The air of sadness around me is terrifying.Happiness is so short lived that I feel scared to be happy anymore. I met my best friend of several years after a long hiatus.The joy of meeting was insurmountable. As the day of the meeting approached,I wondered if that old connect would still be there or would we feel awkward to even talk to each other.Nevertheless, I had a hundred things to say to her,tell her about all the happenings in these years of being away and listen to her story in turn.
Surprisingly,when we met,it felt like we had just met yesterday.As if these long years had never existed. As if we had never really been that far away! The feeling of giving her a tight hug was so reassuring,so comforting and so nostalgic,that it brought a lump to my throat.
We settled in an ambient restaurent for a small bite and a long session of soul talk.I narrated how I had been doing all these years,how I had married the person of my liking and had now settled down at home looking after my children.I knew she had got married,so I inquired about how she was doing.What she narrated,jolted me out of my seat and made me numb with pain.She had lost her husband to cancer a few years after her marriage and was living all by herself.Listening to the trauma she had undergone all these years made my heart ache and looking at how bravely she had faced a calamity of this nature and was living life so courageously and maturely brought tears to my eyes.I felt sad at the very thought of not being there for her when she would have needed my support.She spoke about how life had come to a grinding halt for her,whereas it was moving on for all others she knew.The difficulties she faced everyday,the emptiness surrounding her,the void she felt back home after a long day at work.I had a terrible feeling of helplessness.I wanted to say something to make her feel better,but did not know what to say.It was so difficult to even fathom the loss,the loneliness,the grief that she was feeling,that nothing I said would seem enough or even appropriate.
Later when my mind ran through her words,I realised how tough it must be for her each day. I was amazed at how much she had, to teach me ,in terms of her experience,how she was taking life in the right spirit,and how mature she had become.
(Pic courtesy: Google images)