UBC day 20 - Ground Zero- concluding part

read part 2 here

It had been a month since they came to Savanpur. Kunal had told her that they could leave in a couple of days. 

"Get packing, Suni, the next batch of doctors are here, we can go back now."

She sighed. She hadn't realised, that a whole month had passed by and it was finally time to leave. She had been so engrossed with the lives of the little girl down the hillock that she didn't know what she would do once she was back home. She decided to capture every moment of the little girl so that she could keep her in her memories forever.

She carried a camera along with her and sat down on her favorite perching place positioning her camera. The little girl was walking towards the shrub with the pickaxe in her hands.

Click…click…click… she went on clicking the pictures with an urgency that she could not explain. She had still not been able to get a shot of the girl’s face. As she kept her lens focused on her face, something happened; the girl looked up at her!

‘I don’t want to miss this shot, she thought, this is as close as it gets. I might not get another shot of her face if I don’t hurry. 

Another click.

Ah! Nice shot!’ she patted herself.

And then she froze!

No, she had to be sure.

She focused her lens on the girl again but she had her back turned to her.

With trembling hands, Sunita switched the mode of her camera from ‘click’ to ‘view’ to have a closer look at the girl’s face.  Hair in disarray, sun burnt face, stubby fingers that looked like they were 50 years old, a pile of sticks nestling between them and her tiny frame…no, her Komal wasn't like this. She was a soft as silk, her hair was beautiful, black and silky, her skin was fair and glowing, her hands were the chubbiest and pinkest that she had ever seen. This couldn't be Komal! 

And then she saw the eyes….Deep black eyes…..Komal…! Unmistakably Komal!

Her heart thumped so hard she could almost hear it …it seemed to be pumping a millions beats a minute! She stood up, hardly able to breath, her face flushed with joy. She stumbled down the hill, falling down and then rolling a considerable distance before she could find flat ground. She searched for the shanty and ran towards it as soon as it met her eyes. The little girl had just reached her home, the pile still balanced on her head. She saw Sunita and gave a little gasp; her eyes wide with shock. She dropped the pile to the ground and rushed into Sunits’a arms.

“Mamma…” she clung to her mother’s bosom like she’d never let her go, crying bitterly, shaking with relief.

“Oh Komal, Mamma’s so sorry,” she said amidst sobs, kissing her child madly. "Mamma is so sorry darling! I will never ever leave you alone like that."

The woman watched the two of them, with tears streaming down her own eyes.

“I am…..” began Sunita, walking towards her.

“I understood that you are her mother.”

“How did you find her?” Sunita wanted to know.

“I was cleaning the hotel corridor that day, when this child was standing at the door crying. Suddenly the hotel started shaking and without thinking twice, I grabbed her and jumped out of the window. We rolled down this hillock and lay here for quite some time, must have been days…" she paused as if she had been transported back to that day all over again.

"I brought her to the relief center but in the mad rush, no one bothered to help me. They took down the details but no one ever got back to me.Your girl was in shock and wouldn’t speak anything for so many days. I decided to keep her with me till someone came looking for her. She kept asking for you, screaming for you in her sleep. I taught her little things to keep her occupied. She’s a smart girl,” she said patting the girl’s head.

“I have seen how well you cared for my little girl.How can I ever thank you….”

“Don’t. I don’t have a family, so I must thank god that he brought this girl into my life, though briefly, or else amidst all this devastation, I would have lost my mind.”

“You must come with us, I’m sure Komal will want you to….” She said thinking of how well the woman had taken care of Komal. It was now her turn to give back.

"No..no..don't bother about me, I'll be fine." said the woman, visibly pained at the impending parting. 

Komal took the woman’s hand in hers and smiled. The woman nodded her head and smiled at Komal. She was now family too.

                                                   ****the end****

UBC day 19- Ground Zero- part 2

read part 1 here.

Two months had rolled by without any news of their daughter.

“Suni, I got a call from Sawanpur,” said  Kunal one day.

“They found Komal?” she asked eyes brimming with hope.

“No Suni, They asked if we would volunteer to help rehabilitate the villagers. Being a doctor, I couldn’t refuse. Would you like to come with me?”

“Of course, maybe we can search for Komal again.”

He didn’t know what to tell her. A mother’s heart could never accept that her child was no more.

                                                                         ********

They reached Sawanpur by the army helicopters as the roads had been completely washed away.Temporary tents had been erected at various places .They had been devastated to see how flat the whole place looked. No sign of the hotel they had lived in.

There was nothing in that place. It seemed like there was never anything in that place. Sunita’s eyes welled up again thinking about Komal. She could not bear to think how the heavy walls must have weighed themselves on her child’s delicate body.

She walked to the ground, sat on it and cried for some more time. She knew she had to accept that she had lost Komal forever. Maybe, acceptance would give her some closure. The hotel was above a small hillock and she saw some flowers growing by the slopes. She gathered herself and walked to the edge, to pluck some flowers and lay it on the place where she had lost her daughter. That's was the only goodbye she could afford to give her child.

Eyes still blurred with tears, she knelt to pluck the flowers. That was when she noticed a small shanty down the hillock. A woman was trying to light a stove made of wood while a little girl played nearby. She stood watching the child, as if it were her own. She couldn’t see their faces clearly as it was several feet down. But she could still feel the mother-child bond that she saw between them. She watched the mother feed and then lull her child to sleep.

As she walked back to their tent, she could not stop thinking about them. Each day after Kunal left for the medical camp, she would unwittingly find herself being carried to the hillock to see the duo. Every day, the little girl would chop some wood from the nearby shrubs using a small pickaxe and bundle it in a neat pile. 

She was amazed at the precision with which the girl chopped the wood, sorted out the dry and wet ones and bundled it neatly. There was a rhythm to the chopping; it almost felt like a song. She also wondered what kind of woman would let a child handle a pickaxe by herself. 

She, for one, had never let Komal even touch the kitchen knife. But, C’est la vie, she told herself,….such was life!

Then she would carry it over her head and bring it to her mother. Her mother would use it to cook food, while the little girl tottered around carrying pots of water from a stream nearby.

“What a difficult life for a 6 year old,” she thought. Her child had never had the need to as much as lift a finger. She would happily dote around Komal all day long, attending to her every need.  

The mother would then lead her child to the stream and give her a bath. The child seemed to like splashing around in the water. 

Sunita smiled. Komal had loved splashing in the water too. She would break into an impromptu dance in the tub, splashing water everywhere! 

 Then she would feed the child ever so lovingly. The child would always eat in silence.

Komal had been quite the prankster. To get her to eat a morsel of food had been so difficult. She would jump all around the place, refusing to open her mouth till Sunita told her a story. 

And then the mother would pat the child to sleep. Perhaps she sang her a song, her pats felt rhythmic. 

Komal had loved the lullabies that Sunita sang for her. Her favorite had been a Krishna-Yashodha song that she would ask to be sung everyday. 

 This girl was so much like Komal. But maybe all little girls were like that, she told herself, not wanting to get emotionally attached.

                                                        ******to be cont*******

Read concluding part here

UBC day 18 - Ground zero. part 1

“Komal…. that’s what I want to name her!” Sunita said excitedly, bringing her bundle of joy close to her and tickling her tummy, making the little one squeal with delight. “Isn’t she as soft as silk?” she asked touching the silky soft cheeks of her baby.

“Indeed she is, Suni, Komal is what we’ll call our baby” agreed Kunal.

Everyone clapped and cheered as the proud parents called out the baby’s name thrice in her tiny pink ears, and the priest continued with the other naming ceremony customs.

Sunita wiped a tear as it slid down her cheeks.

“Stop watching this over and over again, Suni,” said Kunal taking the remote from her hands and switching off the VCD, “It’ll only make forgetting Komal harder for you.”

“You think I can ever forget her? Which mother can? It’s my fault….”

 “…..Shhhh….don’t say that. It’s not your fault.” His voice was choked with emotions too as he thought of that fateful day.

                                                                 ***********

The three of them were holidaying in the picturesque location of Sawanpur, when the rain gods vented their fury and turned their lives upside down.

“I’ll run down to the lobby and try to hire a cab, ok? Let’s see if we can get some flights from the nearest airport” Kunal had told Sunita. It had been raining too heavily and there had been no point staying there any longer.

 Then Kunal called up on the intercom.

“Suni, get my wallet, I left it in the room.”

“Komal’s sleeping.”

“It’s ok; it won’t take long, its just 2 floors down.”

Sunita had run down to the lobby when there was some strange noise and someone pushed them out of the lobby door. In the seconds that followed, the entire hotel collapsed. They had both escaped with minor bruises, while their 6 year old Komal lay trapped in the rubble somewhere.  

They stayed for several days amidst the ruins waiting for it all to be cleared up, but the search had drawn a naught. Sunita had been in deep trauma over losing her only child. She had refused to leave the place and had to be sedated before being forcefully airlifted back home.

                                                                      *****to be continued*****

read part 2 here

UBC day 9 -The fire that rages within - part 2

Read part 1 here

He met the caretaker the next day.

“Jaggu Bhai,” said Arun, “I wanted to know if Bittu has been in a fire accident ever? The boy seems pretty scared of fire.”

“Never. Though he would often wake up perspiring and shout for his mother.”

“He knows who his mother is?”

“How could he? He was 6 months old when someone left him at our door.”

This wasn’t leading him anywhere. He decided to meet Bittu’s close buddies.

“Chintu, Motu, do you know why Bittu is so scared of fire?” he asked the two boys.

They looked at each other and then at him.

“He would often say his mother died in a fire” said little Chintu.

Arun froze temporarily as if he had been hit by a light pole.

                                                        *************************

The heat was unbearable. The curtains and upholstery had caught fire. The whole building was on fire. He was screaming for help but there was no one to save him. He was slowly losing consciousness and slipping into a deep sleep.

Bittu got up with a start. It was that nightmare again. It had been recurring with an alarming frequency.  Bittu looked around. It was terribly dark. All he could hear was the thumping of his own heart. He had thought that coming to a new place would rid him of his nightmare, but he was so wrong. His nightmare had recurred thrice in 3 days. That was bad. In fact, he hated this family. All that love seemed so hollow. He wanted to run away.

                                               ********************************

“I don’t think adopting this little boy was the right idea” confessed Arun to his friend.

“Maybe you are right. But you know why you adopted him, isn’t it?”

He did.

He had been having recurring nightmares too. That woman had tried strangulating him so many times before. You killed my son, now I’ll kill you, she threatened.  He had woken up gasping for breath, each time pleading to be forgiven. As atonement for his sins, he decided to adopt a little orphan boy and bring him up.

It had not taken much to convince his wife. Their own son was terminally ill. She would need another child to direct her affection to after he was gone.

But now he wondered if Bittu was indeed that child he had mistakenly burnt when he put Sarla on fire. Had he come back?

He had always suspected Sarla, his first wife, of having an affair with his best friend. He had left her soon after Raghu was born as he had been convinced Raghu was not his son. A few years later, someone had told him that she was about to marry that friend. In a fit of rage, he had set her on fire with the help of his friends. But he had not realized that Raghu had perished in that fire too. He had later married Smita but by a cruel twist of fate, his own son was now terminally ill.

His hands trembled as he thought of it now, and to calm his nerves, he lit a cigarette and propped it into his mouth.

                                                                    ***************************

Bittu picked up his little bag, slung it across his shoulders and crept outside in the darkness. He saw a figure standing in the veranda, smoking a cigarette. He had to cross that way in order to get out. As he crouched and walked he kept his gaze steady on that figure. As he streamed closer, he realized it was Sahay. He didn’t want to be seen. And then his eyes fell on the hands. He stood frozen in fear! They were the same hairy hands that he had seen strangulating his mother. He trembled with trepidation, perspiring, in spite of the coolness of the breeze. He looked closer. Unmistakably, the same bracelet hung loosely from his wrist. An ‘A’ overlapping an ‘S’. 

Then he saw the cigarette butt fall from the hairy hands. It fell at his feet. He picked it up and walked around the house putting every curtain on fire. He stood near Sahay’s bedroom and threw the butt on his bed. Then he swiftly walked away without looking back.

Aided by the breeze, the fire had caught on and had ravaged like a wild beast. He could hear screams but he dared not look back. The morning broke with the terrible news of how the Sahay villa had suddenly caught fire and how poor Mr.Sahay and an unknown person had perished in the fire. Mrs. Sahay and her son had miraculously escaped, but there was no news of the little orphan boy they had adopted. Maybe he died too.

                                               ***************the end*****************

This story won the second highest score in the total points tally!!!

UBC day 8 -The fire that rages within.

This is also my entry for the IBL at writeupcafe and also won me the IBL Booker prize for it!! Yay!!

                                                     ******************

The winter had gotten too cold for comfort.

“Let me get this fire burning,” said Sahay, as he walked to the fireplace. “It’ll keep us warm.”

 Bittu sat huddled on the farthest corner of the couch. He was already feeling quite warm in the oversized pullovers of Sahay’s son. This was actually the warmest he had ever felt. His previous winters had all been spent huddled together with Chintu and Motu under one tattered blanket that Jaggu dada had given them. It had just been a few days since he had been adopted by the Sahay’s but he already missed his bosom buddies. He wondered how Chintu and Motu were coping with his absence. Were they missing him too? Jaggu Dada was not the kindest of caretakers but Bittu had always felt at home at the orphanage. He had lived there ever since he was born.

“Ah! Here we go!” said Sahay as the fire leapt up from the logs.

“No!” screamed Bittu closing his eyes and covering his face as soon as the first flame leapt up in the fireplace.

“Are you ok son?” asked Mrs. Sahay gently caressing his hair.

Bittu did not reply. He ran out of the room and hid under the staircase. Mrs. Sahay found him weeping copiously and shivering with fright.

“Oh, you poor baby,” she said pulling him out of his hiding hole. “Did something scare you child?”

No answer. Just a few more sniffles.

“It’s ok. Let me put you to bed. You’ll feel better.” And with that she led him to his room and tucked him into bed.

                                           ********************************

Two men stood by the door blocking the exit. Two others had pinned his mother down and he saw her struggling to break loose. One of them had covered her mouth with his big hairy hand and held her hands together with the other. A bracelet hung loosely from his wrist, something like an ‘A” overlapping an ‘S” in gold at the center. The other accomplice was pouring some liquid on her clothes. He saw her eyes turn red….very red, before they eventually bulged out and she stopped struggling. There was a collective round of laughter and then the man with the hairy hands took out a match box from his pockets. He lit a cigarette and propped it into his mouth and threw the lit matchstick on one end of his mother’s saree. A huge ball of flame suddenly engulfed his mother’s body and he saw the four guys running out of his house.

                                            ********************************

“Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa………”

An ear splitting scream rented the air and almost jolted the Sahay’s out of bed. Mrs. Sahay rushed to Bittu’s room. He was sitting up, staring in to space, beads of perspiration running down his forehead.

“What happened? Did you see a bad dream?”

He sat like a rock.

“Here, drink some water,” she prodded, pushing a glass of water into his little hands.

“Why don’t you sleep next to him Arun,” she asked her husband.

“No, I’m ok” said the little boy.

“Sleep tight little one, we’ll all go camping tomorrow. You enjoy that.” said Mrs. Sahay, pulling the sheets over him and gently placing a kiss on his forehead.

                                         **************************************

The forest was beginning to get denser.

“Let’s camp here. I don’t want to go further in.” protested Sahay’s son. “It’s getting scarier too.”

They set up their camps on the banks of a stream nearby while Sahay piled up the wood for the campfire. Bittu watched him nervously as he lit the fire and put on the music. The sight of the fire leaping up and dancing in the gentle breeze was intimidating and Bittu’s face drained of colour.

“No fire...No fire… put it out…put it out…” he screamed waving his hands frantically.

“It’s going to be cold soon, son, we’ll need it to stay warm” he reasoned.

Bittu began sobbing uncontrollably and Mrs. Sahay forced her husband to put it out and suggested that they head back home.

What’s with this boy, wondered Arun, as he doused the fire that had taken so long to ignite. He is just ten, but terribly scared of something. I must find out. Could he have been in an accident? Probably a fire accident?

                                       **************to be cont****************

Read Part 2 here.

Naughts and crosses - Part 3

Read part 2 here


“Shalu, I am resigning” she announced to a shocked Shalu one day. “I cannot carry on like this anymore.”

Shalu knew it would be useless trying to convince Aditi once her mind was made up.

“Did you tell Anup?”

“I haven’t spoken to Anup in ages now.”

“Won’t he mind if you quit without telling him?”

“I don't think so. At least he won’t have to think about me seeing Rohit every day, if it’s playing on his mind, that is.”

But quitting the job was no solution. Anup still seemed light years away from her. He had been working more than ever and had become quiet and withdrawn. She decided that she could not let their relationship fall to pieces like this. She had to do something to save it.

After Anup had left for work, she took out their photo albums and started making a collage. And underneath each of the pictures she wrote her thoughts in a neat handwriting.

“The first time we met.

At Neetu and Dilip’s wedding. I remember how everyone commented that we actually looked like a couple, though we had just met! We were always the ‘made-for-each-other-couple, isn’t it?’ ”

“Our engagement.

I am so sorry I selected one size too small for your engagement ring! But you still made sure to squeeze it in somehow! It showed me how much you loved me.”

“Our first outing together after our engagement.

You managed to sneak me away from the whole bunch of our relatives for a photo session. I thought that was incredibly romantic.”

“The big day- our wedding.

People could not stop raving about what a lovely couple we made. I cannot forget how you had sneaked in fruits and secretly met me, making me eat it! Mom was so mad at me later for breaking the ritual of getting married on an empty stomach! But you knew I could never go hungry for such a long time. You worried more about me than any ritual in the world.”

“The best gift you have ever given me- our son.

You couldn’t see me in labour and almost yelled at the doctor for not easing my pain. I still remember the tears of joy in your eyes as you held Abhi for the first time. I know that you have not only felt and lived my anxiety through the nine months of my pregnancy but the pain of labour too!”

“Our perfect family.

Me, you and the symbol of our everlasting love-our little Abhi.”

She broke down as she wrote the last lines.

The perfect family.

 It wasn’t perfect anymore. She had ruined it all. She continued writing her eyes blurry with tears.

“There are so many other pictures that could not be in the album, because they are in my heart. The picture of the smile on my mother’s face as you comforted her when Dad was being wheeled in for surgery, the look of content on my dad’s face when you held his hands and told him you will always be there for him and for us, the gratefulness on my brother’s face when you were along with him for his college admissions, and the love on my sister’s face as you took the entire responsibility of her wedding, like only an elder brother would.

You have been my biggest support, and I want to tell you how much I love you. I promise to never hurt you ever again, please forgive me one last time like you always have."

She decorated the border and left it to dry in her room. She hoped it would remind Anup of the love they shared and how much he meant to her. She hoped he would forgive her.

Anup had stopped eating at home for a very long time now, and so she decided to carry lunch for him to office that afternoon. She made Anup’s favorite ghee rice and korma and packed it along with some carrot halwa, dropped her son at her mother’s place and went to his office. She was standing outside his cabin door and about to knock when she heard Anup talking to his best friend and colleague, Ashok.

“I have to tell you something Ashok,” he started, his voice choked with emotion. “I want to file for divorce.”

“I suspected something was wrong with you, you haven’t been your usual self for quite some time, but divorce? That sounds too drastic. What happened suddenly?”

Anup told him about the phone call that had changed his life, which had brought his life to a standstill and had destroyed his faith in love and marriage. 

“How can you take such a hasty decision, Anup? I suggest that you talk it out with her. Just keeping quiet is no solution.”

“There is nothing to talk anymore. Trust is the basis of any relationship, and when that is gone, there is no use pretending that everything will be ok. I don't know if I am feelinng angry, cheated or just sad. Maybe all of it." ”

“Have you told Aditi?”

“I will, tonight.”

Did he say divorce? He surely didn’t mean that, did he? She panicked. She wanted to go in and talk to him, beg him, not to leave her like this. But maybe she deserved this, she thought. She went to the reception and left the lunch box with the receptionist and walked away.

“I still think you should talk to her first” Ashok said, “Think about Abhi. He needs both his parents, isn’t it?”

“How will I ever be sure this will not happen again, or has not happened before?”

 “She could have chosen to keep the secret from you, but she didn’t. Doesn’t that show how much she loves you and how much she has regretted that moment of weakness? You cannot punish her for being so brave. Cross your heart and tell me, would you have had the courage to confess if you had been in her shoes? Everyone is entitled to be forgiven once, and I think Aditi deserves to be forgiven too. The last few weeks have been punishment enough for her.”

Just then the receptionist called and informed him that his wife had visited and left lunch for him at her desk.

“See what I mean? She loves you, man, and is wallowing in guilt, forgive her” said Ashok. “Life is like a game of naughts and crosses, at each naught that life plays, you must know where to add your cross, if you have to win. Remember, three naughts in a row and game’s over.”

                                                                                     ****

She could not bear the thought of having to live without Anup. She took a cab and went to sunset point, the place that was witness to so many of their happier memories. It was Anup's favorite place in the world.

She had been a little too early to witness the sun god make his downward descent. She sat on a rock, unable to look at the sun still shining brightly over her head. ‘I can neither face you nor Anup’, she thought, ‘you will leave me in a few hours from now and so will Anup.’

She wondered if she had done the right thing in not listening to Shalu. A cloud of gloom and depression was beginning to descend on her and she decided that she would see the sun go down one last time.       

                                                                                     ******   

Anup rushed home to talk to her. She wasn’t there. He went to his room and saw the beautiful collage she had left to dry. His eyes welled up as he saw each picture and read every beautiful sentence beneath it. ‘How could I have been such an idiot’ he thought. He called her mobile and found that she had switched it off. He called her mother.

 “Did she tell you where she has gone, ma?”

“No, is there anything wrong?”

“Nothing. I’ll call you later.”

Then he called up Shalu.

“No, Anup, she’s not with me. Is she ok?”

“I can’t find her, Shalu,” he panicked, beads of perspiration starting to form on his forehead, “can you come over?”

Shalu had dialed all of Aditi’s friends’ numbers on her way to his house but without any luck.

 “Where do I find her now?” Anup’s voice trembled as he paced across the room nervously cracking his knuckles.

“I suggest we go to the police, after sunset it will be too dark to even search for her” said Shalu.

Then it suddenly dawned on him.

Sunset. Yes, there’s where she could be, at sunset point.

“I think I know where she is” he said.

He rushed to their all familiar place and was relieved to find Aditi watching the sunset.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” he said walking to her side and putting a loving arm over her shoulder.

“It wasn’t until now”, she said resting her head on his shoulder, suddenly relieved that a big load had been lifted of her chest, “But now that you are by my side, it has become as beautiful as it always was.”

He smiled.

He had put his cross in the right place and knew that the game was now theirs.

                                                        *********the end************

Naughts and crosses Part 2

“Good morning Aditi! Hope your intoxication has worn off. You were pretty high yesterday!” laughed Shalu easing herself into a chair.

Aditi sobbed softly standing by the window gazing into the oblivion.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” Shalu looked concerned. She had been Aditi’s best friend since college and people didn’t call her mother hen for nothing. She had always been overly protective about Aditi.

Aditi broke down crying bitterly, “Anup will never forgive me. How am I going to face him? What will I tell him?”

“Aditi, sit down,” she said helping her to a chair and giving her a glass of water, “tell me what happened.”

“Rohit and I, we- we were together last- last night,” she replied, her face buried in her palms, unable to look at Shalu in the eye. “It was a bad moment….I didn’t mean to….I am so ashamed of myself…” she was still crying.

“Wh-What? You did what? Are you crazy? Rohit and you? Oh my god! How could you guys do that? I told you to get back to the room, didn’t I? You were so damned drunk. Shit! I should never have left you alone there.”

“I need to tell Anup everything,” said Aditi, reaching for her mobile, wiping the tears off her eyes with the back of her hand. “This is one secret I don’t want to keep.” Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks.

“No, no, no, no, no….you will do nothing like that. Get it? Don’t make such hasty decisions. One wrong decision and your life will be ruined.”

“That wrong decision has already been made, and my life is already ruined, isn’t it?”

“Come with me; let’s go to Rohit’s room.” She snatched the mobile from Aditi’s hand, pulling her to her feet. “Let me give that idiot an earful. Who does he think he is?”

“He did not do it, do you get that Shalu?” she said pulling her hand away and taking the mobile back from Shalu’s hand. “‘We’ did it. We, as in me and him.”

“Why won’t you ever listen to me? You didn’t last night and you aren’t now” said Shalu fed up with Aditi’s attitude.

“Leave me alone Shalu. Just go.”

“Look, I know how you feel right now. But no one knows about it. It’s just the three of us, and I swear to god, no one will ever know.”

“My heart knows, doesn’t it? Anup deserves to know. My heart says so.”

“Didn’t your heart tell you anything when you were lost in Rohit’s world last night?” Shalu could be wicked and hard hitting at times.

“Shut up Shalu,” said Aditi turning her back to her friend, tears again beginning to roll down her cheeks. “That was mean, you are hurting me. Why don’t you just leave?”

“I am not going anywhere. Can’t you understand something as simple as this, you fool? You have Abhi to take care of. What if Anup does not forgive you? What if he decides to leave you? Can you think of living without Anup, without Abhi? Can Abhi live without his mother? Don’t do this Aditi, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life, trust me. And what about the shame it will bring you? Did you think about how your families will react?”

The truth, they say, is bitter. But to Aditi, it felt like poison, threatening to suck the very life out of her. She sat down looking out of the window of the hotel room, far into the horizon, and at the sun, as if by some magic, the whole time between now and last night would automatically rewind, the last night’s moon would come back and she would never repeat this horrible mistake again. Ever again.  

There was a knock at the door and Shalu opened the door, to find Rohit standing there.

“Look who’s here! Weren’t we missing you, Mr. Casanova? I am so angry that I could just slap you right across your face.” Shalu was seething with anger.

 “Can I come in and speak to Aditi for a minute?”

“No, you may not” she replied, trying to shut the door on his face.

“Shalu, look, I need to talk to her, please let me” he pleaded, pushing the door back and finally succeeding as Shalu gave in.

He walked into the room, and saw Aditi staring into space, “Aditi, I- I am sorry, very sorry.” He stammered as he reached out to her hand.

“Don’t” she said withdrawing her hand, rising and walking into the washroom, shutting the door behind her with a bang.

She filled the tub and immersed herself in it lying in it for a very long time, as if the water would wash away her guilt. The hot water felt like tonic on her skin. She cried herself to sleep in the water, and Shalu had to repeatedly bang the door to wake her up and find out if she was ok.

 “We have to pack and leave now, ok? Everything will be fine, I promise. Just remember, not a word to anybody,” she said putting a finger to her lip, “bury this secret right here, in Delhi, get me?”

As Shalu closed the door behind her, Aditi took out her mobile and dialed Anup’s number.

“Anup…” she began.

“What a surprise! How was the award function? Hope you guys enjoyed your trip?”

Felt like sarcasm. Maybe she was imagining it.

“You are reaching today isn’t it?”

“Tonight.”

“Ok, I’ll pick you up from the airport.”

“Anup…” she paused wondering how to say it, and then she took a deep breath, mustered all her courage and confessed, “Forgive me Anup,” she said starting to sob softly, “I-I was drunk and had been dancing with Rohit, then he came to my room and..” she was crying bitterly now, “….that was one bad moment, Anup, I didn’t mean to hurt you like this, trust me. Last night didn’t mean anything to me Anup, it never will. Because I love you and I always will. I couldn’t carry the burden of hiding this from you. Please forgive me Anup….”she begged.

There was a long silence at the other end, Anup trying to comprehend what she was saying. She wondered if Anup was listening, “Anup… are you there? Won’t you say something?Anything? Your silence is killing me.” And then she heard a distinct beep of the phone being disconnected at the other end.

                                                               ******************

“Didn’t Anup come to pick you? You told him you were coming tonight, right?” Shalu was surprised not to see Anup at the airport. He wouldn’t have missed it for the world.

Aditi looked around to see if she could spot him. She waited for another half an hour but there was no sign of her husband anywhere.

“You told him about that, didn’t you?” asked Shalu, shaking her head, eyes wide in disbelief.

Aditi’s eyes welled up again and she lugged her suitcase walking briskly to the exit, Shalu hurrying to catch up with her.

“Let me drop you home, Aditi. It’s on the way.”

“No, you carry on, Shalu, I’ll go by myself.”

“Why are you so stubborn? Do what you want.” She could not understand why someone would be so foolish. But she also worried that Aditi may not go home, or try to hurt herself. 
“Please go home, ok, and be safe” she said before she went out and got into a cab still worried for her friend.

Aditi sat for another hour in the lounge thinking about what Anup would say to her. Would he really leave her and go away? Will she lose Abhi and Anup forever?

She finally got up, hailed a cab and reached home. Anup opened the door and for a moment, she thought he would give her a warm hug, and tell her how happy he was to see her.

No hug.

Not even a smile.

But the pain in his eyes was evident. He stood for some time, looking at her; perhaps waiting for an explanation and she stood speechless, even unable to look him in the eye. Before she could gather herself and say something, he turned back and walked away.

“Anup…” she called out, trying to reach out to him. She ran behind him, but he walked straight to the guest room and shut the door on her face. Teary eyed, Aditi walked back to her own room and stared at a picture of them taken on their wedding day.

“I am sorry Anup,” she said gently caressing his picture, “will you ever be able to forgive me?”

 Anup left to work before she got up. She called him repeatedly on his mobile, but he was either too busy with work or had not bothered to take her call. She waited for him to call back.

No call.

She went to her parents place to pick up her son and spent time with him at home still waiting for Anup’s call.

No call still.

She sent him a message.

Anup, I am sorry. Talk to me, scream at me, fight with me, but don’t be quiet, it’s killing me.

No reply.

He came back long after she had slept.

He had been avoiding her for almost a month now.

She had messed up the game. Fancy putting a cross in the wrong place! She should have known better.

                                                              ****to be cont****

Read part 3 here