“Call me as soon as
you reach Hyderabad, don’t forget, ok?” said Malini looking visibly concerned.
Sending your 18 year old daughter alone on a night bus to a
city 500 kms away wasn’t so safe in these days and times. But who could ever
win an argument with Shreya? Once she had made up her mind, no one could
persuade her to change it. Malini had tried her best to convince Shreya to
study in the city, but the young girl had her heart set on a prestigious
college in Hyderabad and had worked hard towards getting admission to the
college of her choice. And now she was leaving home to join college in a new
city with new people, and Malini grew sick trying to think of how Shreya would
adjust to the new environment.
Shreya gave her a shrug and a nod, so typical of girls her
age. It was beyond her comprehension why her mom was so ballistic about her
studying in Hyderabad. She wondered how her mom would react when she told her
about her plans of going abroad for her Masters. We’ll cross the bridge when we come to it, she thought and smiled.
“Bye Ma, you take care, ok? Take medicines on time, eat on
time and get some good sleep, don’t fret over me. I’ll be fine.” She said
giving her mom a peck on her cheeks.
Her mom was crying now, hugging her daughter tightly, as if
she’d never let her go.
“Oh Ma, come on now, don’t do this, we’ve discussed this a
hundred times before. Now be a good mom, and give me a smile.” She comforted
her mom and wiped away a tear before rushing out. “I’m getting late, ma, don’t
wanna miss the bus. Muaahhhh Ma” she blew her mom a kiss just before she
disappeared out of the gate.
*************
14A…14A….Ah! Here it
is… she found her seat, settled into it, plugged her earphone on and closed
her eyes. She could feel the bus filling up, and then someone settling into the
seat besides hers. She was in no mood for small talk and chose to keep her eyes
closed. Leaving home was an emotional moment for her too but she had tried not
to show. Nothing could come in between the grand plans she’d made for herself.
Not her mom, not her emotions, nothing. She knew her mom would be all alone
now, but Shalini aunty next door had promised to look after her. Her thoughts
of her mom and her home coupled with the soft whirring of the bus and the
gentle movement soon lulled her to sleep.
**************
Shreya got up holding her abdomen. The pain was severe and
she wondered how she was able to actually get up in spite of the pain.
Suddenly, what had seemed like a sharp shooting pain had miraculously vanished
and she felt just fine. She touched her abdomen where it had been hurting and
it seemed like it had been a bad dream. Something bright shone in the distance
and she opened, closed and blinked her eyes trying to adjust her vision to the
source.
And then she saw it.
A bright blinding light.
Seeming to come from what looked like the end of a tunnel.
Walk towards the light
Shreya. A soft voice called to her.
Shreya, obeyed and walked as if in a trance. And then she
stopped mid track; her attention diverted as she saw the bus.
The bus she had been
travelling in.
Turned turtle, it lay in the middle of nowhere. And then
there were people. People gathered around, trying to pull the passengers out of
the bus. A girl in a blue salwar kameez was now being brought out. The body
looked limp and lifeless. Her earphone wrapped around her neck. Shreya,
instinctively touched her ears.
No earphones. Where did her earphones go?
And then she walked closer to the girl. The earphones looked
similar to hers. The girl was bleeding at her abdomen. Something sharp seemed
to have pierced through. Then she looked at the girl’s face.
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Image: Pixabay.com |
Oh God! That’s me! Am
I…?. She cupped her mouth with both her palms drawn together and froze even
as reality dawned on her.
That’s why the
bright light…
She took one last look at her own lifeless body and then turned
around and began walking towards the bright light at the end of the tunnel,
shoulders drawn in, and her back almost in a hunch. Her heart was overcome with
grief at the thought of how little she had been able to achieve and how little
she had lived. She thought of her mother, what she would go through, looking at
her daughter’s dead body. She didn’t even want to think about it.
God, why me? What did I do to deserve this?
Keep walking child;
you are in my care now. There’s nothing to be afraid of.
It was the same voice. But it wasn’t like someone was
speaking to her. It almost seemed like the voice was in her head. She continued
to walk towards that light. As she emerged from the tunnel, she saw the bright
light but now it looked brighter and pulsating with life, the air filled with aromas
she had never smelt before and music so soothing that she had never heard
before. Someone was walking towards her, and she thought that he looked so much
like her.
“My child, my Shreya”
he said giving her a hug.
“Who are you?” she asked pushing him away.
“Bhaskar, your father.”
“No, you are not my dad, my dad’s Anil Kumar.”
The man just smiled and walked away. Then she saw her dad
and ran to him.
“Dad, I missed you so much. How could you leave us like
that?”
Her dad smiled and held her hands in his. “Sometimes, that’s
the only option we have, child. Your mom is right about what she thinks.”
What did he mean by
that? But she seldom understood what he said.
Then she heard that voice again.
Close your eyes child.
She did as she was told. Glimpses of her entire life passed
by like she were watching a movie. The little Shreya, center of her mom’s
world, everything her parents had done for her, the fun times, the sad times,
her dad’s sudden passing away, her school life, her friends, the times she had
hurt her mom, everything. When she
opened her eyes, there was no one with her.
“That is it God? I really haven’t got much done isn’t it? I
can’t believe you took me so soon.”
What is it that you
wanted to do?
“I wanted to get a degree, go abroad do my masters, get a
great job, get married, have kids, lead a good life.”
All that is of no use
when you come here. As you have already seen, you will not bring anything of it
with you. Do you want to see what you left behind? Look there.
She saw herself lying on a bed in the ICU. Bandages running
across her abdomen and wires running, literally, everywhere. Then she saw her
mom. She was standing outside the ICU. The doctor was talking to her.
“I don’t think we can save your daughter, not even a miracle
can,” the doctor was saying to her distraught mother.
What a liar, I’m
already dead. Why doesn’t he just say so? She thought.
Because you aren’t...not
yet. The voice.
Her mom broke down and there was no one to console her. It
pained Shreya beyond what she had imagined.
Suddenly the truth
dawned on her.
How she wished she could hold her mom again and sleep on her
lap! She meant so much to her mother but she had only thought about herself and
nothing more. In fact, she had never thought about anyone else. She had been
proud, arrogant, and selfish all through.
I’ll grant you a
choice, child. You can choose between coming back to life or going towards
death. If you choose life, you’ll wake up in that hospital bed and go on to
lead life till you come back to me again. If you choose death, you’ll be free
of all your bonds and stay here with me.
“God, give me another chance please, I beg of you. I
understood what you meant…what my purpose in life is. Let me go and live that
life you would have wanted me to lead.”
**************
The electrocardiograph had started showing signs of activity
again, just as the nurse was about to report that it had become blank. She
rushed out to call the doctor.
“Maliniji, looks like there’s been a miracle, this is not
something you see every day. Congratulations, your daughter is a fighter after
all.”
***************
A fortnight later, Shreya was ready to go home, though she
still needed to rest for some more time.
“Mom, would you believe if I told you I went to heaven and
came back?”
“I’ll believe anything you tell me darling.”
Poor child, she
thought, must be hallucinating from all
that heavy medications and anesthesia.
As if reading her mind, she asked again, “Would you still
not believe me if I told you that I met Bhaskar, who said he’s my dad?”
“What….?”
“And that the only dad I know, committed suicide? You knew
that all along, didn’t you? He said you were right.”
“How…? Oh my God… Shreya….” She didn’t know what to say. Shreya couldn’t have known any of this. She
had never mentioned this to anyone ever. No one except herself knew. Did Shreya
really die and come back? Did she really meet her father? Maybe it was time to
tell her everything.
She knew her mother believed her now. “Can I sleep on your
lap mom?”
Shreya smiled as her mom ruffled her hair. Life never gives
you a second chance, she was just plain lucky. The light at the end of the
tunnel had shown her the way.
***************